Exoskeletons. Those creepy, shell carcass things that you find littered all over the South Eastern part of the United States after the Cicadas have hatched out. They look almost exactly like the bug itself but really it is just an empty shell of what it was and I have never quite figured out how it stays intact while a big 'ol flying critter busts out of it. Occasionally, I will admit that I like to use one to prank the kids and leave the thing perched atop the front door handle and wait for the inevitable freak out and screams. This never fails to entertain me. Hey, I'm a Gospel Girl, I never claimed to be a saint. What is so nifty about these exoskeletons is the metaphor I'm about to use, because I'm just clever that way. They represent that growth took place. Simple as that. They are a visual testimony of development and change, leaving behind what was no longer needed so that a newer, bigger, faster, stronger version can emerge and live. Now don't skip ahead to the conclusion already, because there are so many neat tricks between here and there and you might miss out on a lesson in unbelievably cool ways God shows His love. Yes, I am using bug carcasses to demonstrate.
I wonder if those Cicadas know what is happening and just hold so, so, sooooo still and wait for the big shed or if there is some kind of frantic, frenzied freaking out that takes place in their little buggy brains? I can tell you how I used to approach those times of growth. Can you guess? "What's happening?! I have to know, OMGGGG, what is going on? I just HAVE to know, right now, right now, right now!!!". Followed by a variety mix of bad coping mechanisms including but not limited to; denial, avoidance, overbearingness, defeat, defensive strategies. You name it, if I was sitting on the verge of something that I thought was going to be uncomfortable, which growth can often be, I was an expert in buggy-brained freak outs and behavior. Often times it was because I was used to how "the world" had taught me to deal with things, an anemic legacy of a diseased family structure. What I knew is that chaos always preceded change and that change had left me on my own way too many times. It was very difficult for me to acknowledge growth as something positive in many instances, especially when I felt that no other option existed. So, how do I define growth? Anything in your life that takes you out of your comfort zone, pushes you to make a decision that is difficult, or reroutes your usual path of least resistance for your greater good. This is why Jesus told parables. Just for people like me, pretty stinking good chance for people like you too, simply because we are inclined to not only walk that path of least resistance, often times we go whistling Dixie down it. Think about it. Chances are if someone walked up to you right now and said, "Hey friend, guess what? Your house is going to burn down and you're about to lose everything in it, but you're going to learn how to live beneath your means for once and your family is going to bond and realize the good out in the world by the ways people try to help you rebuild!" you'd not welcome your house burning down just to grow in financial discipline, learn the love of community or just how much you and your familymembers need one another. I doubt you'd welcome the opportunity of perspective there, but ask anyone who has been through such a disaster and chances are they learned something epic because of it. Found the "silver lining".That's called growth. That's why the term "growing pains" (I'm rocking the clichés today!) gets thrown around. It doesn't always feel so great. It is easy during those times to feel like you're being punished or that God isn't seeing you or hearing your prayers and resort to buggy-brained freaking out, but this is when He is closest. This is when we should rejoice! No, I'm not bat-poop crazy; I am a believer in God's crazy love for us! When all is lost, we are in the perfect position to find Him and the most awesome flip side to this is that He is looking for us. Not in a casual, "I wonder what Gospel Girl is up to these days" kind of way. No, God's way of locating a lost lamb is beyond anything even this never-at-a-loss-for-words girl can explain. It's equal parts passion, mercy, providence, grace, love and a fierce burning desire to reunite the lost one with it's Shepherd lest that lamb be lost to the crippling, debilitating life that sin will enslave you in. Remember those parables I mentioned?!! Luke 15:4, " What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the one that is lost until he finds it? And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders rejoicing. And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and neighbors, saying to them, 'Rejoice with me for I have found my sheep that was lost'. Just so, I tell you there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance." Whoa. God is out there looking for His lost sheep to bring them home to His Kingdom. I give up looking for my car keys*3 minutes into the search and I really need those for life to be right. God doesn't need us, but He loves us SOOOO much that He NEVER STOPS LOOKING. I love Him so much that I never stop seeking Him, Jesus showed me everything I truly need for life to be right and it is all written down in one place, a true instruction manual on life, The Holy Bible. And ready for the BAM! moment; this is why when I face change now, I embrace it. It still might fit funky, but I know that God is up to something, the Holy Spirit tells me, "Just wait it out" and I do as gracefully as a former buggy girl can. Why? Because my Savior told me this juicy, little tidbit; "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the Glory of God?" John 11:40. BAM. Meditate on that for a minute. Let it sink in, hold so, so, sooooo still and then let God shed off whatever it is you need to outgrow, without fear. Let God do His thing. Even though it would be really awesome to see a little exoskeleton to prove that you're busting out of something, just believe His promise and take that walk in faith. Look to Him for that promise of Glory and it will be revealed in a way that only the growth that preceded could have prepared you for. Okay, the more I think about it, an exoskeleton of a human would just be weird, but it served dramatic purposes.
I think about that time I spent as a lost sheep. It's like looking at someone else's life. Seriously. I see pain, a desperate need for acceptance and love, but still a beautiful spirit that needed just the right love. Jesus bathed me with His radiant love, that life in darkness is forever behind me. What I still can't fathom is how little emotion I have attached to it anymore. I'm grateful for it and understand that without those challenges, I wouldn't be equipped to do what the Lord is calling me to do now and I'm getting closer to it every, single second. Praise God! I now know what it means to live. My testimony is now my exoskeleton, I show it to others so they can see how Jesus busted me out. Lookout or I will start climbing trees and singing all night long. Just one more amazing way God shows His love.
Recently I was asked to do a "cardboard testimony". One word to describe what life was like before I found Christ (or He found me) and one word to describe what life is like now. I can't wait to reveal that to all of you at the right time, but I'm curious to know if you'll share yours? If you haven't found Christ yet, what do you think your life is like in comparison to those who have? I'll leave you with this, what do you have to lose?
Love Never Ends.
Father God, I thank you for never giving up on you search for this lost sheep, even when I didn't think I was worthy of being found. Please use me to guide others towards You, let me reflect the love and mercy that You have shown me so other lost sheep will see Your light to find their way home. In Your Holy Name, Amen.
*Side note, when I do find my car keys, I tell everyone I know about my small victory to prove that I am not, in fact, bat-poop crazy or approaching it. Yet. This is why I keep writing; if just one of you finds a bright spot in your day by me telling of the Victory in Christ, I praise God.
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