Chocolate Covered Repentance

When words come out of our mouths, they take on a life of their own. Funny how a combination of letters and sounds, consonants and vowels can hold so much power. They can be twisted, manipulated and emphasized to either do harm or good. Too often I find myself marveling at how my sarcasm doesn't translate so well via text message. Or how a comment made from the best parts of my heart could carry a barb that stings the ears it falls on. Intentional or not, I find these moments to be among the most uncomfortable and I will mourn the inflicted until my heart bursts. Why am I so sensitive about this? Because I know who I am. I know the strongest gift God blessed me with. Mercy. And I am an encourager. It is my weapon of choice against that delusional dragon. Jesus did say that "out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks"(Matthew 12:34). If my heart is overflowing with love, grace and mercy, so will my lips to encourage. Why?

The word encourage has a secret. 

It has courage in it. Literally. 

Courage is what knights mustered up to save damsels in distress. Courage is what John Wayne described as "being scared to death, but saddling up anyways". Courage is the very strength Jesus bore that cross on His battered flesh with. Because He had faith that God knew the best and only way to save our bleak souls from the death we brought upon ourselves named "sin". 

When Jesus rolled a stone away from a borrowed tomb, He filled us with the courage to look evil in the eye and say, "where's your sting?". Have you read the High Priestly Prayer lately? Hours before Jesus died, He petitioned God to keep believers safe from the evil one. As Jesus faced death, He interceded to our Heavenly Father to protect us from sin AND that the very love God has for Him be in us. 

Yet, we barely have the courage to give up chocolate for 40 days. If that stung, I apologize.  I encourage you to go a little deeper and understand that Lent isn't about finding some trivial thing to "sacrifice" so you can joke about it with your friends. Lent is a season of reflection on our weakness and dependence on the Almighty God. It is a way to fast from our insecurities and feast on Grace. Engorge ourselves with truth and the ability to bravely call upon our Abba Father to forgive our ever wicked flesh. Think your flesh isn't wicked? Repent of pride then and swallow it down. Follow it up with a huge gulp love He will pour down for doing so. 

Lent has me studying love. Repentance. Resurrection. Not because I want to know about Jesus. I want to know Jesus. I want to know that when I open my mouth, I am saying what He is saying. Let me have the courage to announce the victory of my Savior by the way I love others. Because sometimes it is so much more than what you say, often it is how you love them. How much grace you have for them in their messiest moments, the mercy you show when they want to look away in shame. The gentle touch of fellowship and the simple acknowledgement that while we are imperfect, we can look to Christ who is perfect.

Announce the victory by acknowledging your failures and turning away from them and by not rubbing someone else's nose in their own. Shout it with the kind word you use to build someone up when they least expect it. Sing it at the top of your lungs by smiling at a stranger who looks like they can use a little courage. Be all there with the people you love, all the time. Have the courage to turn down the distractions, walk away from the argument or repair a relationship that never should have come undone. 

More than anything, have the courage to trust in the very God who brought you to life. Even if you can't see the light right now, do not stop being it. Draw your sword and encourage yourself, your family, your friends, your co-workers, your enemies and your world by the way you love. Think you can't make a difference? Have the courage to tell that thought to go back to the hell it came from. Jesus Christ didn't rise from the grave so you could live in defeat. Whatever it is you might be facing, I'm going to ask you to speak to it. Tell it this, "This time, I trust in the Lord". You won't be forsaken. You won't be let down. You will announce the victory you've been praying for and all of Heaven will rejoice with you. 

My identity is firmly rooted in faith. Even if my mouth gets me into trouble, I can rest assured that my heart is what God is interested in.  It is a heart convicted to serve Him, because complacency just doesn't taste good anymore. Not since I learned who I am. 

I am Heaven's Daughter. Courageous and dangerous with a sword of truth. 

If you aren't sure of who you are, I encourage you to find out, too. In the meantime, read this;

"For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons by whom we cry "Abba Father!" The Spirit itself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God." Romans 8:14-16

His word is alive and so am I. 

Love covers a multitude of sins. 

The Greatest of These

Have you ever held a diamond up and shined a light through it? It casts a myriad of rainbow colored hues in so many different directions that it is impossible to contain all of the beams. This effect, is a multiplication of light in a broad spectrum of colors. Quite a miracle if you ask me. This is exactly what happens when Jesus pours His love into us. It is true, when Jesus puts His light in us, it comes out in vibrant ways and scatters in so many different directions that it leaves satan's head spinning. This is why love is the greatest of all things. This is why love is our most lethal weapon to plunder hell with. I wonder if Hallmark will ever put that on a Valentine's Day card? "Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd love nothing more than to plunder hell with you". Now, THAT is romance! Those hues, bouncing off of everything, can color the darkest places and make them beautiful. That is what love has done for me, at least. Is that more romantic?

Today, as we all know, is Valentine's Day. This, is going to be a mushy post. Don't say I didn't warn you. 

If you've read my previous blog posts, you know that I love God, my Father, with all of my mind, heart and soul. What I haven't mentioned much of is the gift of love He put in my life in the form of my one and only. You see, a couple of years ago, I bumped into this guy who lives across the street from me and nothing has ever been the same. Only a Father as loving as The One who rules the heavens could know that he'd be exactly the one to love me in a way that would break down the fortress around my heart. He is steadfast in a way I have never known. I've thrown my best tantrums, had my worst meltdowns, failed and triumphed and all along the way, he's never left my side. He's seen the worst of me and loved me in those moments. He has seen the best of me and encouraged me to go even further. There have been times when I have made it difficult to love me and he was merciful, dug in and loved me even harder. My insecurities have become easier and easier to leave behind because of who my sweetie is. A man who loves the Lord. A man with an earnest and loyal heart who wants nothing less than God's best for me. A man who chooses to not only love me, but to love and care for my children as well. He doesn't have to, but every single day he looks after all of our needs, never once worrying about whether or not it is his repsonsibility to. The most humbling thing I can acknowledge though is this:

He loved us when we were the least of these, so that I could experience the greates of these. Before I turned my heart over to Christ, before I was Gospel Girl, there he was loving me and my children. When I had nothing to give, he didn't try to take anything from me. When I couldn't find anything good in me, he still saw it. When I was standing on the ledge, he talked me down. He helped me find my faith and walked me into the church where I found my home. He has shown me what hope looks like and continues to help my build my dream.. And the greatest of these? This is the kind of love that endures all things. The kind that wakes up and chooses to do it all over again no matter what. And every day, I choose him.

Happy Valentine's Day, sweetie. 

Father, the gift of love you have given me in Brad is exceedingly beyond anything I could have ever asked for. Thank you for loving me enough to bring me to the one person who would shine Your light so brightly into our lives, I praise you for Your wisdom and Sovereign hand in our lives. Please continue to bless us as we walk towards you together and lead our children towards your Kingdom. Also, his eyes will always be my favorite shade of blue, you did a great thing there! In Jesus Name, Amen.